Winds of change

It has been an interesting couple of weeks. Lots of change swirling around and while I love change, I am at the point where I am just wanting to be quiet and still for a bit. That being said, I am heading up to a friends place on a lake to spend the weekend. Driving up with my son and his girlfriend so it will be nice to actually see my son for more than a couple of hours. He is busy as is everyone else but I do miss our talks. Of course, he is not a kid anymore and has a life that he is cultivating very well if I do say so.

And this man that has been around for the past 6 weeks or so is definitely making his presence known. It has been so long that I actually had someone who looked like he might be around for a while that I am finding myself anxious. Trust issues coming to the surface but for him too so we are both working on similar life transitions. He is older too and had been having a hard time just allowing US to become something - with time. He had been pressuring me to commit to him without even allowing me to really know him. But thankfully I am able to communicate and with equal thanks, he is able to listen, absorb and then share his own views of the whole thing. So perhaps a relationship is actually developing. I'm taking it easy though as I don't want to jump in with all fours.....as has been my habit in the past. See..........there are advantages to age.

Been working on the preliminary work for the retreat that I am going on in November and that has been an exercise for sure. Having to go back and try to remember things from my past - from birth to right now. I have a lot of blank spots where there should be memories so it is making me feel rather ungrounded and unsure of myself. I spoke today with the facilitator of the work and she assures me that this is not out of the norm but still, when I have spent the better part of my life with all these blank spots, to have to TRY to recall events and situations is causing me a fair bit of angst. However, I did choose to do this work knowing full well that it would get uncomfortable. I know that by the end of the retreat things will have shifted significally.

So there you have it. I am stil alive and well and will post again real soon. And for those of you in Canada, hve a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend.

Katrice