Embracing the Shadow

I had thought that "Embracing the Shadow" would be a good title for a poem but perhaps it might be more of a book title. I realized today that I was having a hard time thinking of the first line for a poem with that title so it has sat on the top of a page in my notebook for a few days. However, today I had a revelation.

Perhaps I should embrace some of the different personas that I am NOT hiding from me these days. One of which is writing erotica. It is SO much fun and today I was invited to view this new website for women called A woman's good night.

I had originally sent an email to the founders of this site in its infancy and it has taken them until now to get it up and running. When I took a peek at the website this morning, I also looked for submission guidelines and poof....I was off and running. I already have a number of short stories that only need a bit of editing so I did just that. I took a couple of them, did some quick re-write and brief editing and hit send. So perhaps soon I will be able to let you "listen" to some of my stories from THAT genre. This site is such that people can download "audio" stories. I might even send in a demo voice tape and see if I can read some of my stuff.....because that is also really fun.....grin.

That part of me is a part that I never really felt comfortable with. But I have to admit that when I read over some of the stuff that I wrote last year, I had to say "woo hoo"....Someone has to write that stuff and since I have a very good imagination, a "bit" of experience from all of my 50 something years (ahem!!) AND I like to write, I think it is about time that I gave myself some credit for that. Allowing myself to write those things that get people all tingly and flushed. I know that I get all tingly and flushed writing them and when I read it to those few people who I allow into that part of me, they too get all tingly and flushed....giggle. I am serving a purpose with that type of writing too and I am finally ready to acknowledge it.

There are so many people out there who are so veryblocked sexually that to be able to open up and allow yourself to "feel" or even remember how it feels is a very good thing. And, on another level, this site will PAY me for my writing.

I have to admit that all this writing has to be more than just me writing for the sake of it. I know that I am helping Me and I'm sure others are assisted or inspired to be more or do more than they are currently doing. For me, writing for a couple of hours seems to free me up more fully to be me. I feel like I am accomplishing something while doing something that I love.

I was talking with my drummer friend last night and I was talking about how uncomfortable I can get with I am left to my own defenses, left to be with just me. I described it like parts of me are fragmented and trying to re-align with the centre. When I find myself in that place, it is VERY uncomfortable. Nothing of note gets accomplished but today while èmbracing my shadow` I realized that there is nothing wrong with me or my shadow self. She has a lot to share and it is through the writing that she can shine. She of course being Me..... She, Me, I..............it is all one and the same. I should remember that. I would not be writing if there were not a lot in me that needs to be out there.

Funny how we unintentionally block our own creative talents because of skewed perceptions of what it right or "proper". Anyway, just thought I'd share.

I started to work on a new story today about people meeting up on a naked beach and....well....you can let your own imagination run wild with all the various scenarios that THAT can conjure up. In fact, if any of you has an idea for a story that you would like to come to life, let me know. I`m open to suggestions. And of course naked beaches leave lots of room to explore the world of sensuality and eroticism.......Gotta love it!

It`s been a good day. Blessings to you all.